Best train journey ever?

I got up, I was going to be heading home today. The trip involved only one train change and was due to leave at 1130. It was now 0830 and I was cooking palmiers. I also did some packing, always useful huh? I also decided I'd like God to have His input on the matter, so I asked that He be in control of the journey. So, it was all plain sailing right? No. The life of a Christian is not one of luxury and ease all the way. Due to the wonderful work of my parents, I found that my train had been cancelled and that instead of the 1130, I'd get either the 1100 or 1200 from Fratton. Not a problem, I got the 1100. The plan was to get to Salisbury and change to one that was going to Cardiff where I'd then switch to travel to Port Talbort. So far, one extra switch and some time problems. My train got to Fahrem and I was told that I'd have to switch. Oookayyyyy, this wasn't quite what I intended at all, however, I was still busy trusting God to be in control that I didn't bother fretting or worrying in the least. After a brief search I found that God had already provided a train that would go straight to Cardiff. I was the 2nd person on and got a nice table seat where I could put my computer and watch "Over the Hedge". Some young lady sat opposite me. The train left. A few stops later the young lady that was sitting opposite me asked if I could move up because her family were getting on, I can't recall if it was just before or after that that she waved madly at some people on the platform. I of course moved up, dissapointed that I now had to store my backpack at my feet rather than by my side, less leg-room is never a good thing. As it turns out, this event was what made the trip great. To my left sat a Man and a young boy, to the right of the lady opposite me sat a young girl. I simply assumed there might be a little more noise, maybe or maybe not a chance to chat a little, however, I was in the middle of "Over the Hedge" and not really interested in chatting, besides, they were already all talking and butting into a conversation is never a good way to introduce yourself. I noticed a few minutes later that the young boy had a good view of my screen and was intently watching the screen. I asked him if he'd seen the film and he said yes, after chatting for about 30 seconds I offered him a headphone and the option to watch the film with me. The gentleman to my left was a little taken-aback by such friendship. I'll admit, it was not without cost, the sound quality dropped due to having only one earphone, the open ear could now hear other stuff but I could still hear the film. After the film, I started talking to them. The gentleman's name is Pete, he is from Belgium and managed to pronounce my name correctly the first time! Much better that "Teflon" or "Teffion" or even "Bob" (yes, someone called me Bob for a week, someone at the CU). Pete studied as a Mechanical Engineer and now does CAD stuff, we chatted a little about programming, however, most of the time, I chatted to max. There's a nice (ish) picture of him on the left of this paragraph. No, he does look normal, that distortion is intentional, we messed around with my computer a little. I also talked to Ella a little (I'm assuming that's how the name is spelt, very sorry if it's not) and also the young lady opposite me whose name I cannot recall, however, I do remember that she had some awesome shoes/boots that looked like they were designed for arctic wear. There is a picture to the right of Ella and the Lady, again, distortion added by my computer. I offered around the Palmiers and not only did everybody like them (some more of the family were sitting nearby) but they were also impressed that a student could cook, a male student! (I quickly alleviated them of this misconception, I am an atrocious cook) I obviously engaged the children in my own amazing way by losing all pride and self-respect. I challenged both of them to lick their nose and elbow and also gave them my walkers ears (the big red plastic ones that walkers gave away free). They enjoyed the time a lot. Sadly they all had to get off at Bath, however, not long before they left, Pete said something that made me think. "We're hoping that Max will grow up to be a gentleman like yourself, you are a really nice person". I really appreciated this, looking back, it never ever entered my mind to play with the children simply to amuse myself, agreed, I did it because it's fun but also because I know how bored children can get on any journey. The family truly made that part of the trip very enjoyable and I am very glad to have met them. I also mentioned the blog and fanclub to them. The rest of the journey was plain, boring but un-stressful. I met my parents and we went to Tesco, they filled me in on everything that'd happened while I was away. We got back and I enjoyed a lovely cooked meal of pasta stuff from my Father. Beats Tuna-Fish sandwiches any day! I played a game of DotA with Coel and then did various things with the rest of my family related to computers. Overall, it's been a good day.

No blog today

I stayed up only a little late (0051) but I want to be 100% sure I can get my train tomorrow, if I stayed up too late then I might sleep in and either miss it or not have time to pack fully. If possible I plan to bring palmiers with me (for eating on the train, not for sharing with the family, they're best fresh!)

How to "deal with" a Gullible person

This event happened last year. I should probably set the scene, I was in my room making a Cardboard Othello Board Game for one of the Children at Church. I'd specifically acquired cardboard for it (for free of course) and planned how to best make it. It was a saturday and I'd done all the WoA stuff for the day. In halls we had free internal phone calls, Lorna made use of this by phoning me. For some reason, Lorna thought I should be getting a girlfriend and was convinced that I had a crush on several different people in the CU. Did Lorna actually display any sense in who she chose? Not really, she picked the ladies in the CU that were not in langstone yet went to the same church as myself and Lorna. Hello Tei, how are you? I'm pretty well, how are you? I'm bored, what are you doing? I'm making something What are you making? Guess Come on, give me a clue Okay, it's made out of cardboard You're making a card for someone! Now, at this point it did cross my mind that I could just tell Lorna she was wrong, however, Lorna is gullible and leading gullible people around a bit can be most amusing. I really cannot tell you one way or the other Who's it for? I can't say Is it for {insert random name of someone Lorna thinks I might like here}? Maaaaaayyyyyybe! Oooooh, they'll love it I never said it was for {name}, you just assumed it was, anyway, don't you think {different name} is more likely? See how I allowed Lorna to think that it was someone, I never once lied. The key thing when leading a gullible person is to never give anything concrete one way or the other. I didn't confirm or deny anything. Of course, do this too long and they'll catch on and get bored, since I couldn't be having that, I decided to prod Lorna a little. Lorna, have you thought that maybe it's not actually a card for a Lady? Nice try Tei, I know it's for {name} Really? I assume that means you don't want another clue... Ooooh, tell me tell me! Nah, it's okay, you don't want to know, I'm sure it'll be funny tomorrow when you're wrong... No no, I wan't to know, pleeeeease tell me I paused as if thinking, I was of course only deciding on the best thing to say. Can I come and see it? BINGO! No sorry, I'm not rushing it Why? It's a labour of love (sort of true, there's more than one type of love) It's for {so and so} isn't it? After this continued for about an hour, by which time I'd completed a lot more of the board, Lorna had iterated through about three or four ladies several times and was beginning to realise not that I was messing with her, but that I wasn't going to tell her. She hung up. Sarah phoned a minute later. The epilogue to this tale is that the next day I encased the game and pieces in two carrier bags, Lorna, Sarah and Brierley all made some attempt to see them, all failed. Before we went into Church I had to break the news, there's a reason for it. We all think it's for Siän, we're going to go in and tell her! Well, that'd be horrible for Siän, imagine the fright she'd have hearing that she would have to accept a hand made card from Teifion! As I had no desires on Siän or indeed any of the ladies Lorna iterated through, I did tell them and Sarah said "I knew it, I knew it!" I realise that this doesn't have a great lesson in it but I found it funny, it gives you a chance to laugh at lorna and if you're a guy, wonder if the minds of all ladies work like this....

A funny story

Today involved me going to a lecture that was cancelled, filling out a log book that I was meant to have done at the same time as my project. With that out the way, I handed in my Java assignment. I then went to the Prayer Lunch a little early, walking with Becca because she was also going early to help with the food (I was just tagging along, otherwise I'd have gotten home and left again in a few minutes). I was not actually there for the Prayer Lunch. There was some Society meeting thing, Emma is our Social Secretary who is in charge of organising social events but was unable to go. Steve was doing some dissitation thing. As such, Becca was going to go. She was very nervous about it so I offered to go along with her as I had some experience of meetings. Well, it wasn't a very organised meeting and I wasn't really needed but it was nice to be able to help. Now, for my article. So far I've had a sum total of zero suggestions. I will therefore assume that everybody here thinks I'm so great that they would have started a fanclub of me if they had the chance and simply think that any of my ideas will be far better. As silly as that sounds, I'll assume it's what's happening until I get a (sensible or at least semi-sensible) suggestion. Today I will (try to) explain some basic principles in telling a funny story. The story I will use is not a long one, actually, that's one of the key points, for a good funny story, you need it to be quick and not drag on too much. The story is also quite simple and easy to follow, another key issue in picking your story, but I'm trying to explain my views on the telling of a chosen story. Enough bandying about the point, it's sometimes useful but generally a bad idea if you're telling a quick and funny story. My chosen story is a tale of my first ever attempt to combat facial spots. For those that know, I have a fairly well cultivated crop of spots on my face, I think they've somehow evolved to feed on anti-spot creams. The bad way to tell the story My Mum got me some spot wipes, telling me they'd remove spots. I applied some and went to school. I was told that my face was all red and looked sunburnt, true, it was. The reason was that I was meant to have wiped off the spot cream. I spent the next few days applying moisturiser to my face. Now, if you really only have 60 seconds to tell the story, maybe you need to cut it down like that, however, it might be best to just tell the story another time, stories tend to be a bit naffer the second time round, the exception being if there's a good break in their telling. This story was told to Sarah about a year ago, she found it funny when I told her on Tuesday. The much better way to tell the story My Mum got me some spot wipes for my face. Apparently they'd remove spots so I applied them and went to school as per usual. At school that day, some of us (myself included) were giving a presentation about some tooth related thing. I did it and felt pretty confident about myself, however, in the Psychology lesson just afterwards, everybody told me I looked really nervous and that I was still flushed. I calmly explained that i was quite okay and there was no need to worry.       By the end of the lesson, they remarked that I was still flushed and almost looked a little sunburnt! My skin felt fine so I told them they were clearly wrong and that I wouldn't be sunbathing anywhere, let alone Wales. I got home and my face was feeling a little sensitive and tight. My Mum commented that I looked like I had sunburn too! Well, it transpires that the wipes were used correctly except that I forgot to wash them off. So, for the next few days I was putting moisturiser on my face and not talking about sunbathing if I could help it. Aside from being longer, what is the key difference in the second telling? I'm fairly sure you found the second funnier. The first thing is that I set the scene more, I explain about how I went to school that day, about some of the events leading up to the "punchline" as it were. I also built up to the "punchline", slowly giving out an idea of what has happened. Odds are you know it's the spot cream but you can't help but think it might be something else. Finally, I put more emphasis on the sillyness of myself and the mistake I made. I make it abundantly clear that I am to blame and thus, I am the one being laughed at. When the storyteller is poking fun at themselves, it's a lot easier to laugh (well, I assume so, I laugh regardless of who tells it). Now, armed with this information, think of a silly thing you did that's not wrong, but is not going to make you look good if people knew about it. Right, try applying the above ideas to it and telling people that don't know about the event. Tomorrow on my blog, I plan to post a story that will in some way mock Lorna and maybe one or two other people. I figured that it's fun to laugh at people such as Lorna the Neck Limpet, the blog will of course have a meaning/message to/in it but what that is, is a secret (for now).

What to write about?

Well, today I went to see my tutor and learn about networking. I then went home, did a load of Java coursework and went to party. At said party, Sarah said that yesterdays blog was naff as it was all about programming. So, what could I write about? I don't want to write about my day unless it was really really interesting. Hmm, tricky one huh? Well, I turn to my list of suggested topics and find that nobody has suggested anything, I think this could be in part my fault for not asking for suggestions. Suggestions are welcome, tell me what you'd like my view on. I do however, have a topic, I will be doing more than dodging the point. For those that know me, I'm rather competitive. The common misconception is that I am competitive at all things, not quite, I am competitive at things I think I have a shot at winning, I could be wrong, but that's how I see myself. I believe it's possible to win anything, if I don't know how to win it, it's because I've not spent enough time thinking about it. Today, I would like to explore how you can "win" at a party. First off, Games! They key thing inherent in party games is that they're normally a little silly. We played two main games today, one where you write the name of a famous person on a post-it note and stick it to someone, they then have to guess who they are by asking questions which people can only answer yes or no to. The trick there is simple, know a lot of people, know the people that your post-it-ee would think of and narrow it down. I'm not very good at that and lost horribly. "Honey I Love you" is much easier for me. The principle of the game is that whoever is on, sits on the lap of someone and says to them "Honey if you love me, won't you smile?". The person who is not on (who is also being sat on) then replies "Honey I love but I just can't smile". If they smile as they do this, they are now on, otherwise the person who is currently on, stays on and moves onto the next person. The first person to sit on me was I believe a lady called Amelia (ever so sorry if I've misspelt that. It's a well realised fact that there are ways to make someone more likely to laugh, modifying the words slightly can produce good results, Amelia decided that stroking my hair would be a good start. Of course, she completely forgot to factor in the complete lack of pride in me playing these games. I stroked her hair, modified my words and didn't even smile a little bit. Suddenly everybody thought it'd be really hard to get me on. The next person to make an attempt was Lizzie. I'm not completely sure why Lizzie did, she knows that I'm not going to smile and likes to win, maybe she thought that beating me would make the victory that much better? Who knows and really, why would I care? When all her attempts to stroke my hair, stroke my face (maybe I just have a very strokable face?) failed to make me laugh she even tried to tickle me, but it was more of a crippling jab than a tickle so it failed horribly. It should be noted that when I tried to stroke her hair, she moved back fast. A big mistake, it helped a lot in not smiling. Note again the complete lack of pride in playing the game, if you don't care what people are doing/saying, you don't care about the outcome and can keep a blank face. The third person to sit on me was Graham. Sadly at the last moment I let out a very very slight smile. Graham weighs slightly more than either Amelia or Lizzie, however, I don't think that's what did it. Graham was wearing a massive ginger wig, I don't think that did it. So, why did Graham manage to make me laugh? I believe it's because rather than getting freaked out like the two ladies when I stroked his hair, he simply laughed and smiled. Amelia and Lizzie had pride (silly silly them) and as such didn't give out any sort of humorous "vibes" as it were, Graham obviously did. So, to win at party games, have no pride. Care not for what people think of you and what people are doing. If you do that your chance of winning is massively increased. Remember that earlier I mentioned "winning" a party? Well, after the games, some people went home, some didn't. Those that didn't stayed in a single room (we had been split into two) and several mini-conversations sprung up. After listening to Jo, Sarah and Brierley talk about Languages and placement in France and/or Spain, I asked them if they'd like to hear a funny story. I told the one about Cocoa Butter vs Spots and then after a nearby conversation got dragged into ours because our group were laughing so much, I told the one where I first tried using a spot-wipe. Both of the stories caused quite a few people to laugh. They both laughed at someone, someone doing something very silly (though they didn't realise at the time) and both had negative outcomes for the person. If you look at it that way, it seems kind of mean doesn't it? Well, I was the person being laughed at and I was telling the story. I'm sure there was a certain element of story telling involved but both were under 3 minutes long. Incidentally I also proved I could lick my big toe, the bad news is that my shoe was in the way, everybody did of course think that was horrible, forgetting completely that I know where the upper-side of my shoe has been. So, to win a party, have no pride. I hope that was informative and funny, I hope to relate a funny story about Lorna, Lizzie or both because apparently they only read my blog on days that I meet them, assuming that'd be the only time I ever say anything funny about them. I'm sure we'll soon find out how true that is ;)

Sorting stuff out

I got up, did some general WoA stuff and then attended my lectures. The first was okay, the second not amazing and the third okay too. Then the Haskell test. In the lecture we were told it would be open book, then during the exam everybody without a laptop said that laptops shouldn't be allowed, me not being a spiteful person I didn't try and remove the open book stuff altogether but I must say that some of the people's spiteful attitudes of "If I can't use a laptop nobody can" was a bit annoying to see, yes, at least one person actually said that. Incidentally I failed the test, no idea of my actual result but I got a fail. However, I needed only 32% this test to pass the entire unit so I don't think I'm doing too badly overall considering there are still two more test then a 6th test which will allow the 5 best marks to be used. CU tonight was pretty cool, loads of stuff about proving the Resurrection. Now for today's "topic". I figured I'd explain a programming concept and even an Algorithm of how to do it! Before you panic, an Algorithm is simply a fancy way of saying "A list of instructions". The topic is of course sorting. On our left we have an example of a "list" or "array" of numbers. Quite clearly you can see that they are in order of smallest to biggest. They are sorted. This has several uses, in particular, looking for a particular thing is much easier and faster if everything is sorted. Thus there are many different methods of sorting, we'll look at one called the "Bubble" or "Ripple" sort. The above list will now be twisted a little, lets mix it up by moving the "4", two spaces to the left and swapped the 3 and 2 around, making the list you see to the left of this paragraph. We're now going to perform a Bubble sort on it. The method of the Bubble sort is to go through every item on the list and look at the item to it's right. Is the item to the right of the item it's looking at smaller than it? (We're assuming you want to sort it from smaller to bigger). If the item to the right of our current item is smaller than us, we swap places with it. The first item is smaller than the second, so on the picture to the left we'll not swap. The colour coding is that anything already looked at is blue coloured, the two items being looked at are bright turquoise (the main item we are looking at is on the left, the one we are comparing it to is on the right) and anything yet to be checked is in pale turquoise. As can be seen to our left, now that we've moved onto the 2nd item, the one to it's right is smaller than it. Therefore we'll swap the currently selected value and the value on the right. SWIP SWAP! Okay, I added in the noise myself, you don't normally get the noise. However, now we've swapped the 4 and 3 around, lets see, oh look, it turns out that 4 is in fact bigger than 2 and we'll need to swap. SWOOPITY SWAPITY! It's swapped, 4 is smaller than 5 so it's not swapped. We cannot check 5 as it's the last item in the list, there's nothing after it to compare it with! What now? Our list isn't sorted yet we're at the end? We go back to the start! Back to good old 1 again. Lets just skip ahead a little... Ah ha! 3 is bigger than 2 so we're going to swap them to come out with.... SWEESH SWOOP The final result! Looking something like this. I'm not going to cover how this algorithm knows how to stop as that's not needed, I hope you've all found this interesting and enjoyed reading, I'm sure the images helped a little :)

Evolution and Creationism

I figured that maybe people would rather a "topic of the day" as it were rather than an in-depth blow by blow account of todays events. This morning's service was a Baptism service, Andrew and Dan were being baptised and it was really nice to be there. Afterwards we had lunch at the Thatched as per usual and I went home. My question is odly enough about Evolution and Creationism. The Christian Bible says that God created the world and all the creatures on it, hence the name Creationism. The theory of Evolution says that everybody evolved from Single Celled Organisms. I'm taking a lot of this form a talk Michael Ots did on Mission Week, the three I recorded are located here. There are 4 key questions to ask. 1) Where did the world come from? 2) Where did life come from? 3) Why did single celled organisms become multi-celled? 4) Why are humans so much more advanced mentally than any other animal? I'm not going to answer the question yet, as far as I can see, an Evolutionist would only be able to answer number 3 and possibly 4. If someone with a view on the theory of Evolution feels that they can answer 1,2 or 4 then I'd love to hear how evolution explains it, you might as well include 3 in there for continuity's sake. Incidentally, if this doesn't make you want a Polar Bear as a pet, odds are you already have one.

Activity!

Actually there's very little activity today. I got up I did WoA stuff I watched 300 with Huw, Andrew and Ryo. So, what on earth will I write? I don't feel it'd be worth your time to visit my blog if all I said were three things? Firstly I'll warn you that what follows is not for everybody, I reckon my guys than ladies will find it interesting. If you find it interesting, you might be interested in World of Arl. 300 is about some Greeks and some Persians. The Greeks fought in what's called a Phalanx, for those interested in a bigger read, Wikipedia has an article on it. For those that don't want to read a lot of stuff, the principle was to have a wall of shields, each man would cover a good portion on the man to his left with his shield while his spear would be held in his right hand over the top of the shield. If you've seen Troy, they use one there. Why am I suddenly interested in something I already knew? Simply put, the Spartans (Greeks) use one. Yeah, I've seen Troy, so why do I suddenly care, and more importantly, why on earth would I care, it's not like I'll find a use for it? Troy focuses very little on the tactics used, it focuses very little on the combat. Sure, it's rather impressive but overall it was a bit fancy and just not my thing. 300 on the other hand was much more combat orientated, in particular, the tactical side was a lot more in-depth than most films. So, now you know that I really like films that display tactical thinking, but why? Well, in World of Arl you can morph a team to whatever you like, one of my teams has it's fighting based around the Roman Empire, it's men have big shields like the Romans and generally fight like them. My current team is based around one person who has an ego that makes a planet look small. 300 has inspired me to design a team that revolves around the phalanx. Specifically the application of such a thing with a very small number of men. I will devote the rest of today to solving the problems inherent in fighting with a Phalanx, specifically one where you have few numbers. 1) A Phalanx has weak flanks The spears point forwards, if you come from the side or worse yet, the rear, you'll crush a Phalanx. The typical method of solving this is to have more men to the sides. Obviously this is going to be the biggest problem with few men. As such I can think of only two solutions to this problem, the first is to fight in a mountain pass, the bad news is that this only works in mountains. Number 2 is to get some allies, now, this is a much better idea, if they send an army and I'm in the middle then my flanks are secure (I hope). 2) A Phalanx simply holds people there Once a charge hits the Phalanx, if it holds then it'll revolve around neither side gaining much ground, the chargers hitting their weapons on some shields while the Phalanx poke people with sticks. Clearly this is a problem. My solution is a simple one, develop my Phalanx to be able to push forwards properly. In WoA you can evolve your people, both physically and mentally, even going so far as to give them an entirely different race. If I make my people 6-7ft tall rather than the standard 5-6ft of most nations, then give them something around 30-50% more muscular strength than the enemy, they'll literally be able to press forwards, trapping and/or crushing the first row of foes, when trapped, they make easy targets for a spear thrust. 3) A Phalanx is defensive You can't charge an enemy with a shield wall, the men are all too close together and if there's a single weak-spot then the entire line can fall. The solution is very simple, march fast in a semi-shield wall to ward off arrows. When near the enemy, form a shield wall. As I'll be using very few people, I will be able to afford to train them to elite status where they can do things like that much faster than normal soldiers. 4) Really heavy infantry can kill you Lets assume I stand still and someone runs into me, I will get knocked over. Now lets assume that I am braced with one leg bent and the other stretched out behind me, odds are they'll bounce off of me. If two or three people hit me within short succession I could well be driven back. If we assume that I have a shield it'll really have little effect. If I put studs on my shoes and was on grass or other soft-ish terrain then I won't move backwards as easily. Better yet, I can have spikes on the bottom of my shield, if I then dig those into the ground then I can withstand several men, even several men wearing very heavy armour (who would thus be harder to stop). Summary 1) To protect the flanks, either leave a wall there or get allies to stand there 2) To kill the people that just ran into your Phalanx, be bigger and stronger than them, then just step forwards slowly but surely 3) To make a Phalanx offensive, well, you can't but you can do the next best thing of making there be less space to advance over 4) To withstand a charge, add studs to your shoes and spikes to the bottom of your shield so that they're basically pushing against a solid wall This was "Tactics with Teifion: The Phalanx" if you have any comments, please leave them. I'd enjoy writing about things like this more often but reckon people would be bored by them. I saw Sam mentioned that people might take an interest in my programs if I explain them more, is this the case?